Film festival- Pariah

This weekend, Sunday 12^th April, 2015 the Trinidad and Tobago film festival features Pariah.  The film is part of a series to promote human rights in Trinidad and Tobago, and is being held in association with the Coalition Advocating for Inclusion of Sexual Orientation. There will be panel discussions on LGBT rights and issues before and after the film.

Pariah means an outcast or outsider. 

To me it’s a story that asks the question, how badly do you want to be free?

The main character Akile, a young black lesbian is a true definition of the film title. She has accepted her lesbianism, but is faced with the challenge of finding a place to belong.  This movie takes us through the painful process of being your authentic self and not being guided by the norms of what is perceived as acceptable.

Akile is an outcast both at home and at school, she’s a man trapped inside a female body she disguises herself in boy clubs at the club and at school, but at home she struggles with her femininity to please her mother. Her mother doesn’t agree with her appearance and her friend and worries about keeping the family conservative image.

This movie is the result of what happens when parents knowingly denies their child’s sexuality but it also illustrate the struggle of a parent to get close to their child. The mother efforts were solely to control and deter the inevitable by buying clothes suitable for a teenage girl and choosing Akile’s friend, who did further damage to Akile’s already bruised self esteem by pretending to love and accept Akile.

The father though more tolerant of his daughter’s sexuality; he lets her wear masculine clothes even though her mother disapproves, he calls her “daddy’s girl” the truth is vivid; within himself he has accepted her without an utterance. Nevertheless, he showed some reservation that his daughter's sexuality impacts his image as a man; this is showcased in the scene when the security guard at the store insulted a lesbian and hinted that he saw Akile at a gay club.  

Lingering questions can stifle families before the truth is known. My emotions varied while watching this movie from depression to discomfiture especially in the scene when Akile is confronted by her mother and the wife says to her husband “You are letting your daughter turn into a man” and her father responds, “Tell your mother this is just a phase.”

Although at times the subtleties seemed predictable as situation like these are not uncommon there is honesty and restraint of a teenager that transcends the pitfalls of homosexuality. The final scene on the rooftop gives a sense of freedom and hope because it expresses that there is the beginning acceptance of her self. No one wants to feel like they are the “other” in society. It is human nature to want to belong somewhere.

When Akile says to her father, “I’m not running, I’m choosing.”

It’s a choice to find her place to belong.